Contracts also tend to remedy the rigidity that could result from unspoken rules of relationships. Healthy relationships often navigate and negotiate new rules. When people and relationships develop, new needs and desires arise. Becoming too rigid will not maintain your relationship, so make sure that your agreement takes into account the importance of flexibility and leaves room for growth, missteps and exceptions that represent the needs of all Many couples are usually engaged before they finally get married. It is recommended that a relationship contract be more than just a set of requirements and regulations that should be met. Obviously, there are topics that might not need much attention for your relationship to thrive properly. But there are things that may not be achievable in everyday life, like. B the quick fight against quarrels like those that arise. In yesterday`s article, 5 Assumptions of Relationship Learning, we learned to build a solid relational basis on some fundamental assumptions.
While these gentle relationship assumptions are a wonderful place to meet as a couple, we need explicit agreements between us and our partners on how to put these assumptions into practice. What agreements can we make with ourselves and our partners on what the relationship should be? What concrete agreements can we, as individuals and couples, commit to strengthening our loving attachment? I strongly recommend that you review and update your relationship agreement on a regular basis. I noticed that somewhere between 3-12 months is ideal. You don`t want to let him down so long that it becomes obsolete and forgotten in its insignificance… but you probably don`t want to repeat it so often (i.e. every 1-4 weeks) that it becomes something that will haunt you neurotic and obsessive. We agree that it is not a requirement of our relationship to share all the same interests, tastes, preferences or limits. Just because one of us likes romantic comedies or sushi doesn`t mean the other should also love these things. We accept that we act differently from one situation to another depending on personal security vulnerabilities or events.